By Greening Ways RIVER GOLD
Updates  09/26/2017; 02/27/2017   ABUSE   Child Abuse     Communication    Male Sexual Abuse     Lost Boys Also see Religious Sexual Abuse:  Mormon     Catholic    Brain Issues childabuse_abuse_humanissues_thegoldenrivernet_updates_06/07/2016_02/07/2017 CHILD ABUSE 1)  Abuse Including Neglect Strongly Connected to Environmental Problems and Planetary Decay  2)  Shrinking of the Self From a Real or Perceived Threat: Shrunken Energy Field, Disassociation  3)  Misdiagnoses of Trauma Victims Common in School-Aged Children, Teens and Others  4)  Rough Treatment of People Found Throughout a Particular Area or Cultural Arena  5) Neglect is Serious and More Common Than Many of Us Realize  6)  Mirror Neurons  7)  Psychic Connections 8)  Narrow Channels In Communication  9)  Lowered Attention Spans 10)  Learning to Recognize and Deal With the Signals of Non-Support From Others In Abuse Issues  11)  You Don’t Have to Put Up With Other People’s Bad Habits and Density 12)  Abuse In Minority Groups Abuse Including Neglect Strongly Connected to Environmental Problems and Planetary Decay As mentioned elsewhere on this website, abuse might be behind much of what we see in environmental degradation and societal problems as a whole.  It makes people shrink and become stiff emotionally (ie, low emotional availability or resilience), mentally (ie, low intellectual capability) and often even physically (ie, tight or hunched shoulders and backs, biochemical imbalances, brain growth problems).  The stiffness might be seen in the emotional and intellectual unavailability to ask questions, handle problems, or deal with new ideas or change.  In addition, there may be a type of inflexibility or narrowness causing people to be afraid to face non-conformity and real or perceived threats.  People might worry about making mistakes to the point they are handicapped from taking on new projects or concepts from fear of punishment, gossip, or some other cause/effect scenario linked deeply within their psyches.  This may because of old pain pictures from childhood or teenager years when discipline may have been too harsh and unfair.  It also can be linked to neglect or other non-nurthering behaviors and approaches in the home and growing up years.  People who are not stimulated or nurtured to be sensitive to themselves and the natural world as children have trouble being sensitively awake and nurturing when they are adults.  In other words, the neglect and abuse may cause blocked behaviors.   (back to INDEX of Abuse top of page) Shrinking of the Self From a Real or Perceived Threat The shrinking of the psyche may be seen intuitively as a drawing in of the energy field of the body. It also can be seen as disassociation which occurs when people numb out from a frightening situation and biologically slow everything down while also psychologically removing themselves from the stimulus: “During disassociation, the brain prepares the body for injury.  Blood is shunted away from the limbs and the heart rate slows to reduce blood loss from the wounds.  A flood of endogenous opioids - the brain’s natural heroin-like substances - is released, killing pain, producing calm and a sense of psychological distance from what is happening. Like the hyper-arousal response, the dissociative response is graded and occurs in a continuum.  Ordinary states like daydreaming and transitions between sleep and wakefulness are mild forms of disassociation.  Hypnotic trance is another example.  In extreme disassociative states, however, the person becomes completely focused inward and disconnected from reality.  Brain regions that dominate thinking shift from planning action to concerning themselves with brute survival.  There is a sense that time has slowed and what’s happening isn’t real.  Breathing slows.  Pain and even fear shut down.  People often report feeling emotionalless and numb, as though they are watching what’s happening fo them affect a character in a movie.” (p. 50, The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog by Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. and Maia Salavistz listed in the Books section.)  If you see or sense a normal healthy person with an energy field that is bubbly with light/color/vitality and is placed in a balanced way within an average distance around his/her body, you know things are in order.  However, if part or all of the person’s energy field has shrunk down inside the body or is kept close to the skin, you may then sense that abuse or illness are connected - the person may be trying to hide or avoid the thing that frightens them.  A person might also do this simply to be deceptive.  This shrunken energy field may be seen, felt, or both.  In addition, the shrunken state may be taken to a point in the body in such a way that parts of the energy field remain fleshed out and fairly normal while certain parts tighten up to a small clenched up spot.  What may be going on here is that when the person was abused to the point of trauma, they may have drawn up a part of themselves as protection, much like a child might take a blanket and cover it over his head or a turtle may go hide under his shell.  The part that is drawn in may stay stuck like that for years, and may be a pain point that, when touched by certain words, behaviors or approaches from others, may drawn in yet further as if to say “Don’t touch me there.  Go away.”  These tight little areas may be places where people cannot advance into the bright light of day - they may keep people locked up in boxes so they are not willing to try new ideas, expand into new directions, or face old demons.  A healthy person has an exchange energy, a back and forthing, a dialogue characteristic.  Pain points or shrunken energy fields often mean people are in a monologue with pain and are not willing to experience healthy give-and-take or growth. back to top/menu Misdiagnoses of Trauma Victims Common in School-Aged Children, Teens and Others In those cases where real trauma has occurred, it’s not just enough to assume that the child is resilient and will come out of it  Very specific healing approaches are likely needed as intervention for someone who has been traumatized.  In the book The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog the author has suggested a variety of healing modalities, including brain development specific therapy, rocking, music with rhythm teaching, art, and healing touch, as through massage, hugs, etc.  People need to be aware of mislabeling or misdiagnoses which assess the symptoms or manifestations of a person’s problem without hitting the core issues; frequently children and adults who have experienced trauma are shuttled in the wrong direction for therapy for these reasons.  There are cases in which troubled young people get lost in the system because their behavior is deemed so difficult that people cannot or will not work with the possible underlying causes of trauma from ignorance, frustration and/or negligence.  Children can go from one “expert” from another, gathering a long list of labels (diagnoses) while never really receiving adequate help until someone steps in and finally realizes that they had gone through serious neglect and/or abuse when younger and that this had literally truncated their development, including possibly causing their brain to shrink.  In addition, people may be stuck in a permanent state of arousal (for example, accelerated heart rate) or carry a repeated tendency for disassociation which may make it further to evaluate what is going on because these symptoms may look like some other psychological disorder. back to top/menu Rough Treatment of People Found Throughout a Particular Area or Cultural Arena Environmental problems often have a self-sabotaging aspect which may be linked to a roughly treated people in an area as a whole.  Rough treatment can be found in groups, with a section of a town, neighborhood, employment arena, church or religious type mirroring the abuse issues onto the environment and feeling of the area.  For example, church groups who use the whip of the belt and tongue to demonstrate God’s authority, male authority, and the battle between the Devil and God may create a whole atmosphere of sadness, fear, guilt, superstition, sneakiness and abuse to the point the way the whole area looks and feels may reflect this.  Sometimes that look may be one of TOO MUCH order - and in other ways, NOT ENOUGH.  In other words, too much exactness and punishment/control issues in the area may cause the neighborhoods to have a Nazi-like order to them - yet others may be dirty, rough and chaotic.  What is going on inside people’s homes and lives reflects itself on the outer world - and if abuse is lurking in the underlayers of those places, it shows itself in a variety of forms.  One way abuse may show itself is through a lack of creativity and artful beauty in an area in such a way everything tends to have a work, work, work  focus about it keeping things drab and mundane (ie, Farmington, New Mexico has several areas with commercial buildings looking like they stepped right out of the oil patch).  At the other extreme, too much glitter in an area with a focus on expensive facades may indicate a false set of standards with underlying secretive crime orders (white collar dishonesty, mob orientations, etc.) - too much expensiveness can also indicate that the little guy -the average man and woman of the streets - is being stepped on with costs too high in an area and the only available jobs too low paying.  That in and of itself is a type of abuse, because it may mean no one of average income level can afford to work or live in an area.  It can also mean that perhaps certain aggressive people who have money have taken their abusive backgrounds to a no win-win situation for many other types of people.  That is, they may have taken their past experiences with abuse to a level of self-protection and survival to the point they squeeze out opportunities for other people.  Victims of abuse may take their experiences to levels of high success and wealth or to the edges of despair and poverty but in either case, a certain imbalance or lack of health may pervade an entire area or system because of this.  The roots of the abuse, if never healed, may play themselves out in different ways even if on the surface things look OK.  back to top/menu Neglect is Serious and More Common Than Many of Us Realize Most people know abuse is not just one thing.  It can include neglect, and neglect in and of itself is a big topic in reference to environmental problems/societal issues because people who are not raised with warmth, human contact, loving attention and careful education don’t have it to give to the world, their children or each other.  It’s like having a type of tone deafness - if you did not see it at home or never got it yourself, you cannot give it to anyone or anything else.   People who did not have careful loving attention may not know how to give it to the environment and the problems we have in society.  One example of this are kids who spend hours each day in front of the television, gaming stations, or the internet.  Their parents may be working and never home, or they may have parents who spend most of the time entertaining themselves or focusing on personal interests to the point they never apply important attention to them.  The kids may even have people around all the time, yet still live in a kind of isolated box because no one ever really shows them loving attention and care. The more usually obvious kinds of abuse - beatings, sexual abuse and verbal attacks - are also important in considering the key roots behind environmental and societal problems today.  People who self-trash usually earth-trash, and the self-trashing may start in early childhood when their parents or other caregivers essentially trashed them - treated them badly without honoring their lives and their overall existence on the planet.  Some of the verbal beratings out there are so bad that it is like programming kids to think of themselves as a no-Self, an object that is nothing worth caring about.  This dishonoring of the Self gets passed on to future children, mates, and the earth itself.  back to top/menu    communication_abuse_humanissues_thegoldernivernet_updates_02/07/2017__updated 06/07/2016  back to top/menu COMMUNICATION Mirror Neurons In The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog, Bruce Perry discusses mirror neurons which help infants learn to mimic their parents’ hugs, smiles and body language. “[Mirror neurons] respond in synchrony with the behavior or others.  This capacity for mutual regulations provides another basis for attachment.  For example, when a baby smiles, the mirror neurons in his mother’s brain usually respond with a set of patterns that are almost identical to those that occur when Mom herself smiles.  This mirroring ordinarily leads the mother to respond with a smile of her own.  It’s not hard to see how empathy and the capacity to respond to relationships would originate here as mother and child synchronize and reinforce each other, with both sets of mirror neurons reflecting back each other’s joy and sense of connectedness.”  (p. 90)  Mirror neurons allow a person to replicate the image and feeling of someone else; they work with imprinting and empathy.  Although some people do not make the link between mirror neurons and telepathy, other researchers do. PBS: Mirror Neurons PNAS - Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America Ccare/Stanford School of Medicine: The Center For Compassion and Altruism, Research and Education Escholarship:  Literary Biomimesis: Mirror Neurons and The Ontological Priority of Representation Note: This is an interesting article. NAU - closer to the Four Corners Area, so may be of interest to locals: Professor Woodruff (NAU) An Investigation of the Relationship between Mirror Neurons and Empathy (NAU) An Informal Blog Response on Mirror Neurons by someone going by Neurontic APA - American Psychological Association. Autism's smoking gun?New research suggests that a malfunctioning mirror-neuron system could be behind the social isolation of autism. Psychic Connections One aspect of communication is the ability to hear and absorb information both laterally and vertically.  One of the things a psychic person can do is sense the train of thought of other people as part of the telepathic ability.  It has come to this writer’s attention over the years that there is a tendency for many people - not just a few - to orient themselves within just certain thought processes or ways of thinking about life.  A lot of this comes from mass media like the news, advertisements, television shows and movies. It can come from certain religious backgrounds, and it can come from the dulled out world of drugs, alcohol, neglect and abuse.  People who have grown up in homes with too much noise and stimulation may later go through life without enough silence space inside themselves to hear nuances - they are always bouncing toward another stimulation of some kind or another; this can lead to poor communication abilities.  If you are psychic, you can pick up a person’s train of thought fairly easily and can recognize if their thinking tends to go in just one direction.  Sometimes you can pick this up before you even talk to them - they are giving off a wide span of information about themselves from their body language.  Some people are half asleep, thinking they are talking “smart” when in fact it’s a repeated set of material they have heard from other people.  They are not working with a living, breathing and fresh approach to things.  A lot of this tendency to be narrow in absorbing information from other people when communicating stems from abuse including neglect. back to top/menu Narrow Channels In Communication The inability to work with other people’s communication unless the communication comes within a certain format reflects a certain narrowness.  If you are psychic and you want to manipulate people (this writer does not like manipulation) you can pick up how people are likely to respond to what you say before you say it and can decide if it is better to walk away and go talk to someone else or stay put.  In addition, you can decide what to say and can figure out in advance whether someone is likely to respond in your favor.  If you work with their belief systems and culture, you are more likely to have a positive response than if you knowingly go against the grain.  You can also sense where people’s egos are and what will push them into a confrontative stance.  This is why it is important that people have more awareness and depth.  People who have worked through a number of personal issues in their life, have read a lot, have diverse experiences and who take an open-minded stance to the whole world as a teacher are more likely to not be manipulated and to have a frank communication posture.  They will be able to switch ideas easily and will be flexible in responding to situations.  People who are on chemically heavy lifestyles may be slow-witted and stiff in their ability to respond to new ideas and information.  They may not feel enough energy to be able sustain more than the most mundane levels of activity.  If you have an area with a cultural tendency to have people drink - that drinking is considered a normal and regular part or even focus of recreation - you may find the entire area has a tendency to keep what is considered normal and acceptable at a certain lower standard.  People who are chemically altered may be thick-headed, more likely to have mood swings and to discourage creativity.  They may tend to be grouchy, impatient and anxious.  If employment in an area shows shaky ground and people in certain industries lose their jobs, if these people were already prone to drinking and excessive chemical alteration (drugs) they may be more likely to take it out on their families and society - as in abuse.  But abuse does not just have to show up in the home through domestic violence - it can have other attributes.  For example, if things are tense in an area because of unemployment and increased chemical use, abuse may show itself in bad driving habits and more accidents.  As mentioned in the Driving Safely section, people may be revving up tension in an area so that even going out on the streets in your car feels like a day at the battlefield.  If you are more sensitive and tuned into these things, you may feel yourself energetically or psychically bombarded by all that negativity.  If you have several people drinking and abusive on the roads, they may be bouncinng that negativity off each other and increasing the feeling of hostility and tension in the whole area.  In other words, they take their bad moods and hostile home lives out on the other people in a community just by driving around.  This sending out of bad feelings to the public domain is a type of communicaiton, usually non-verbal, but can include things like expletives and hand gestures as people drive around expressing their impatience and disgust with other drivers.  The tension people feel driving around communities can eventually wind up back at home, adding more tension there.  So it is reciprocal - what goes on in the homes gets put out on the public domain, and what is out on the public domain gets brought back home.  Abuse has wide-ranging ramifications. back to top/menu Lowered attention spans Both abused and not-so-abused people in society today have lowered attention spans.  Part of it is probably coming from chemical and energy pollution in the enviroment.  We are being bombarded by a variety of energy waves from all directions, and we are impacted by chemicals in almost everything we touch and buy.  If we are not personally buying it, we are getting it from our neighbors and what is considered “normal” and “acceptable” governmental actions - ie, mass herbicide sprayings along roadways and on park lawns and other public garden areas.  Even If we personally live organically, we are not able to seal off our air, water and soils from the actions of other people in the public domain.  When we have a lot of other people around us on autopilot with low attention spans and the inability or unwillingness to think further than a few narrow conception lines, we may find ourselves with little recourse.  If people have shallow thinking processes and lowered attention spans, it is hard to get their attention long enough to work on a problem.  This in and of itself is a type of abuse - the inability to be heard and have your concerns responded to adequately.  Inadequate responses to concerns can include things like ignorance, impatience, ridiculing and intolerance.  If your concerns cannot be heard by a great majority of fellow citizens with anything that seems like a broad and serious response, the best protection from this kind of abuse is to learn how to protect yourself in advance from other people’s inability to think things through and to respond appropriately.  How do you that?  One way is through psychic awareness. back to top/menu Learning to Recognize and Deal With the Signals of Non-Support From Others In Abuse Issues If you sense that someone will not respond appropriately to your concerns because of their narrow thinking patterns, lack of education, impatience, chemical dependency/influence issues, or something else, you need to know how to get through.  If you can sense intuitively that someone is not likely to hear you out and respond, you need to learn how to assertively find the right people and resources who will do what is needed to get the job done.  The job can be anything needing a positive redirection - getting out of abuse, changing an area pollution problem, improving behaviors at the work place, etc.  You have to start learning to sense the people who are broader and more awake.  These people will have better internal resources to respond to problems with some vibrancy, creativity and depth of thought.  You also need to learn how to get numbers of these types of people working on projects together so that more gets done from a group level than normally can get done with just one individual.  You Don’t Have to Put Up With Other People’s Bad Habits and Density Remember, pollution in the environment is a type of abuse; bad treatment on the job is another; domestic violence is yet another.  If you can recognize those things that as a whole are not working for your best interests because of other people’s lack of insight and personal lifeway habits, you are taking the first steps to personal freedom of choice.    Just because it is out there harming you and others does not mean you have to take it.  But making a change may mean having a certain heightened level of awareness so that you can avoid pitfalls or stumbling blocks.  You may have to intelligently weave your way through mazes of difficulty to finally fling open the corridors of receptivity, truth, responsiveness, responsibility and overall positive activity.  If they won’t change, move on to someone or somewhere else where there is a better chance that you will be heard and respected.  Don’t unnecessarily take on their problems or narrowness of vision; acknowledge it for what it is, and go find someone else with a better attitude and intellectual disposition.  For every nine turkeys there are a couple of angels; you may have to make a lot of phone calls before you get to the right person, but don’t give up - there is always someone out there who will know exactly where you are coming from right off the bat, or they will “get it” within a short period of time after listening to you. Once you realize this, you will make a better Truth Warrior for yourself and your kids; you will have learned there are people out there who really and truly have “the right stuff” to make your life better (if you are in an abuse situation) and to make this planet a better place to live.  It’s just we all have to find each other. back to top/menu Abuse In Minority Groups Minorities have been recognized as a large highly varied group of people with statistically higher isues of low income and poverty, crime and substance abuse.  Although we are seeing, and will continue to see, many improvements in minority relations, education and employment, it is still a sad fact that minorities may still over-represent those populations with higher than normal rates of abuse, including neglect.  Some of it has to do with transgenerational poverty and abuse. Socially and culturally sensitive therapy is needed; not all shoes fit the same feet.  And where there may be similiarities of orientations within a particular minority group, we still must get to know each person as a unique individual.  Lumping people as one thing or another based on their group type may have applications up to a certain point, but beyond that superficial level, people wanting to help those with abuse problems need to identify more specifics as to cultural identification. For example, two different people may speak Spanish and be considered Hispanic, but with further study, we may find one recently came from Mexico and the other has had family living in this country for hundreds of years. In the hands of a small town non-minority not used to interacting with either category of person, they might get lumped together as “brown folk” which makes most of feel uncomfortable (as it should) - but this kind of narrowness of scope when it comes to certain groups working with other races unfortunately still happens. If a mixed race therapy program is at hand, be sensitive to minority fears and resentments toward non-minorities; the discrimination or superficial relating to other cultures can go both ways.  For example, certain minority groups may have learned from their parents that all whites are discriminatory and dishonest.  When faced with a white counselor, the children may be tense and resistant to therapy for these reasons, not because of anything the person has or has not done at that point.  Both minorities and non- minorities, in other words, may jump to conclusions about another person’s race or cultural disposition before getting to know them.  On the other hand, very real discrimination issues have come up many times in this country over race and culture with whites using their own cultural approach on other people while also casting certain groups or types of people into small boxes which did not fit.  Abused minorities were mishandled and mislabled because of this. back to top/menu malesexualabuse_abuse_humanissues_thegoldenrivernet_updates_02_07_2017_update 06/16/2016; 02/22/2017 back to top/menu  MALE SEXUAL ABUSE See also: The New Gay World    Does Abuse Cause Homosexuality?     Sex     Abuse Links on Male Sexual Abuse Boy raped for years by men in animal costumers Men Can Stop Rape - Various Resources

1 IN 6 Org: Others Who Were Involved- Why Do Adults Fail To Protect Children From Sexual Abuse Or Exploitation


RAINN (Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network) Org Male Military Rape Books on Male Sexual Abuse Murphey, Cecil and Gary Roe   Not Quite Healed: 40 Truths for Male Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse  (2013) Preble, John M.  and A. Nicholas Groth Male Victims of Same-Sex Abuse: Addressing Their Sexual Response (2002) Lew, Mike Victims No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering from Sexual Child Abuse (2004) Bolton Jr., Frank G.  and  Larry A. Morris, Ann E. MacEachron Males at Risk: The Other Side of Child Sexual Abuse  (1989) lostboys_abuse_humanissues_thegoldenrivernet_updates_02/07/2017_updated 06/16/2016  back to top/menu LOST BOYS:  CHILD ABUSE OF YOUNG MALES  Bring Our Boys Home Young males seem to often get lost in the system with inadequate protection and support services.  I am definitely worried about females, too, and continue to do what I can for all genders, but I keep having the understanding and feeling that our young males are not receiving enough attention for what they could go through and what they actually experience.  We are talking across the board - all races, cultures and areas. We need to bring our boys home.  We must help bring young males and those who are male adults with injured inner children back to their true selves and to a more awake, understanding and caring society. I feel the following issues should be considered: 1) Sex abuse; this can come from either gender and from a variety of contacts in a child’s life. 2) Emotional abuse including neglect in various forms - because boys are male, societies often think that withholding emotional support makes them stronger. It can include slappy talk from mothers.  How many times have I heard this in Walmarts and grocery stores, parking lots and restaurants - mothers scolding their kids in the most awful tones of voice?  It can include fathers not wanting mothers to turn their sons into sissies by coddling them.  It can include emotionally the detached handling of fathers and controls over what areas of the emotional spectrum a male can enter and voice or show feelings.  Atmosphere of heaviness, fear, anger, jolts of off/on nurturing and coldness/abuse can both encourage and be emotional abuse.  Fathers teaching their sons that their mothers don’t have to be obeyed or are not worth listening to, or are objects of scorn and abuse are part of the emotional abuse package in a home. 3) Physical abuse - fathers can beat the heck out of their sons, apply group beatings with other males in the family and friendship circles to “teach” a male a lesson (this can happen when the sons go against the system or when they do something else considered wrong), and they can quietly molest their sons.  Mothers might take out their anger with their fathers, husbands and boyfriends on their male children.  Some women might do spiteful, mean little things to their sons which don’t show up readily as abuse. Culture and race specific issues: other races might lump a group of people together and hold back support in a variety of ways.  A white can walk in the door of a counseling center staffed by different races and not receive adequate help for a variety of reasons, while a person of color or other orientation than this particular group of counselors, social workers, medical personnel, police officers, etc. might walk in the door and find an emotionally unavailable group of whites.  Either way, a child might find that skin color, lack of money or where/how he or she lives prevents good assistance and therapy.  I overheard one young man and spoke to another recently about how stressful things are for youth these days, and that kids are having to grow up faster than previous generations.   I know that historically there were many kids wandering around New York City near the turn of the century homeless and hungry.  The same holds true for Berlin, Germany after World War I if not before.  Young people have had to grow up without loving families or adequate support in other times, but we must acknowledge that what youth are going through today has its own textures and orientations.  One kind of lost boy - that of the  Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (FLDS):   
System Abuse System Abuse
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